They only come out in the night. Or in this case, the day.

Homer no function beer well without. I don't like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing, there's too many fat children. A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner.

Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen. I didn't think it was physically possible, but this both sucks *and* blows. A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner.

I'll be back. You can't keep the Democrats out of the White House forever, and when they get in, I'm back on the streets, with all my criminal buddies.

I was saying "Boo-urns." Lisa, vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos. Human contact: the final frontier. Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark. Kids, we need to talk for a moment about Krusty Brand Chew Goo Gum Like Substance. We all knew it contained spider eggs, but the hantavirus? That came out of left field. So if you're experiencing numbness and/or comas, send five dollars to antidote, PO box…

1. How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?
2. But, Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills. You're from two different worlds… Oh, I've wasted my life.
3. I don't like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing, there's too many fat children.

Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark.

Brace yourselves gentlemen. According to the gas chromatograph, the secret ingredient is… Love!? Who's been screwing with this thing? Oh, everything looks bad if you remember it. Stan Lee never left. I'm afraid his mind is no longer in mint condition.

• I've had it with this school, Skinner. Low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children…
• I hope I didn't brain my damage.
• Duffman can't breathe! OH NO!

Books are useless! I only ever read one book, "To Kill A Mockingbird," and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin…but what good does *that* do me? Uh, no, they're saying "Boo-urns, Boo-urns."

Our differences are only skin deep, but our sames go down to the bone. I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes! I hope I didn't brain my damage.

Remember the time he ate my goldfish? And you lied and said I never had goldfish. Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? *Why did I have the bowl?* Bart, with $10,000 we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love!

I don't like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing, there's too many fat children. Jesus must be spinning in his grave! Get ready, skanks! It's time for the truth train! Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!

Dad didn't leave… When he comes back from the store, he's going to wave those pop-tarts right in your face! You know, the one with all the well meaning rules that don't work out in real life, uh, Christianity.

Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get. How could you?! Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain Whatshisname? We live in a society of laws! Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughing, did you? Except at that guy who made sound effects. Makes sound effects and laughs. Where was I? Oh yeah! Stay out of my booze.

I'll keep it short and sweet — Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. I'll keep it short and sweet — Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

Don't kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about! And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker. Your questions have become more redundant and annoying than the last three "Highlander" movies.

I'm a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world. Inflammable means flammable? What a country. Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark. Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.

I was saying "Boo-urns." The Internet King? I wonder if he could provide faster nudity… I hope I didn't brain my damage. Yes! I am a citizen! Now which way to the welfare office? I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I work, I work.

Oh, a *sarcasm* detector. Oh, that's a *really* useful invention! And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker. We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy. I was saying "Boo-urns."