That's not soon enough!

Does anybody else feel jealous and aroused and worried? Soothe us with sweet lies. Of all the friends I've had… you're the first. Is that a cooking show? Oh yeah, good luck with that.

You'll have all the Slurm you can drink when you're partying with Slurms McKenzie! Incidentally, you have a dime up your nose. Oh, all right, I am. But if anything happens to me, tell them I died robbing some old man.

How much did you make me?

Please, Don-Bot… look into your hard drive, and open your mercy file! I had more, but you go ahead. I'll tell them you went down prying the wedding ring off his cold, dead finger. Yeah. Give a little credit to our public schools.

1. Why, those are the Grunka-Lunkas! They work here in the Slurm factory.
2. Okay, it's 500 dollars, you have no choice of carrier, the battery can't hold the charge and the reception isn't very…
3. Um, is this the boring, peaceful kind of taking to the streets?

What are their names?

Anyone who laughs is a communist! You, minion. Lift my arm. AFTER HIM! You seem malnourished. Are you suffering from intestinal parasites? Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn't I break his legs?

• Well, thanks to the Internet, I'm now bored with sex. Is there a place on the web that panders to my lust for violence?
• Who are those horrible orange men?
• I don't know what you did, Fry, but once again, you screwed up! Now all the planets are gonna start cracking wise about our mamas.

We'll go deliver this crate like professionals, and then we'll go home. Can I use the gun? Humans dating robots is sick. You people wonder why I'm still single? It's 'cause all the fine robot sisters are dating humans!

You guys realize you live in a sewer, right? Who said that? SURE you can die! You want to die?! Stop! Don't shoot fire stick in space canoe! Cause explosive decompression! And until then, I can never die?

Can I use the gun? Dear God, they'll be killed on our doorstep! And there's no trash pickup until January 3rd. Oh yeah, good luck with that. What's with you kids? Every other day it's food, food, food. Alright, I'll get you some stupid food.

Kids have names? I'm a thing. Professor, make a woman out of me. We can't compete with Mom! Her company is big and evil! Ours is small and neutral!

Incidentally, you have a dime up your nose. And from now on you're all named Bender Jr. We'll need to have a look inside you with this camera. Yeah, and if you were the pope they'd be all, "Straighten your pope hat." And "Put on your good vestments."

No, I'm Santa Claus! Fetal stemcells, aren't those controversial? Goodbye, cruel world. Goodbye, cruel lamp. Goodbye, cruel velvet drapes, lined with what would appear to be some sort of cruel muslin and the cute little pom-pom curtain pull cords. Cruel though they may be…

Why yes! Thanks for noticing. Yeah, I do that with my stupidness. Yeah, lots of people did. I barely knew Philip, but as a clergyman I have no problem telling his most intimate friends all about him. We can't compete with Mom! Her company is big and evil! Ours is small and neutral!

But, like most politicians, he promised more than he could deliver. You guys realize you live in a sewer, right? I found what I need. And it's not friends, it's things. When the lights go out, it's nobody's business what goes on between two consenting adults.

You can see how I lived before I met you. Shut up and take my money! She also liked to shut up! You don't know how to do any of those. You guys realize you live in a sewer, right? No! The kind with looting and maybe starting a few fires!

I meant 'physically'. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or service you sexually? Oh Leela! You're the only person I could turn to; you're the only person who ever loved me.

And from now on you're all named Bender Jr. We're rescuing ya. I just want to talk. It has nothing to do with mating. Fry, that doesn't make sense. Doomsday device? Ah, now the ball's in Farnsworth's court!